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Thread: Official Joke of the Day Thread

  1. #811
    Senior Member bluecat's Avatar
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    Your efforts with the Jefferson's are not lost on us. We appreciate your dedication and your creative wit.

    I write English not so well, but this thin string for sewing or fabric-making my funny wheel getickles. Baron von Schtupp

  2. #812
    Senior Member Swamp Fox's Avatar
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    So I have that going for me, which is nice...

  3. #813
    Senior Member bluecat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swamp Fox View Post
    "Look at me, I'm borderline obese!"
    I write English not so well, but this thin string for sewing or fabric-making my funny wheel getickles. Baron von Schtupp

  4. #814
    Senior Member bluecat's Avatar
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    I figured that the 38 guests would appreciate that one.
    I write English not so well, but this thin string for sewing or fabric-making my funny wheel getickles. Baron von Schtupp

  5. #815
    Senior Member Swamp Fox's Avatar
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    Dress sizes go up to 38?

  6. #816
    Senior Member DParker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swamp Fox View Post
    Dress sizes go up to 38?
    Have you seen some of the land wha....er...pin-up girls that bluecat has posted?
    Don't go ninja-in' nobody don't need ninja-in'.
    - Diemon Dave

  7. #817
    Senior Member bluecat's Avatar
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    Don't make me do it. I'll turn this thread around.
    I write English not so well, but this thin string for sewing or fabric-making my funny wheel getickles. Baron von Schtupp

  8. #818
    Senior Member bluecat's Avatar
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    A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike.

    The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc can I ask you a question?"

    The surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle.

    The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take valves out, fix'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?

    The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, whispering to the mechanic....."Try doing it with the engine running!"
    I write English not so well, but this thin string for sewing or fabric-making my funny wheel getickles. Baron von Schtupp

  9. #819
    Senior Member Swamp Fox's Avatar
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    Way out in backwoods Nebraska, a man's wife went into labor in the middle of the night. Their son went to fetch the doctor, who arrived just in time.

    To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said, "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing."

    Amidst a lot of cursing and shrieking, the doctor delivered a health baby boy.

    The father was relieved, but the woman still seemed upset and agitated, so the doctor apologized for all the cursing and shrieking.

    "No, No!" yelled the woman. "I'm having another one!"

    Sure enough, within minutes the doc had delivered another baby.

    "Now don't be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern, young man! It seems there's yet another!" cried the doctor, as a third baby began to appear.

    The new father grabbed his chest in bewilderment and yelled, "Do ya reckon they're attracted to the light?!?"

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